1. Why don't skeletons fight each other?
  They don't have the guts.
2. What do you call cheese that isn't yours?
  Nacho cheese.
3. Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?
  It was two-tired.
4. What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
  Nothing, but it let out a little wine.
5. Why can't you hear a pterodactyl in the bathroom?
  Because the "P" is silent.
6. Why did the scarecrow win an award?
  Because he was outstanding in his field.
7. Why did the math book look sad?
  It had too many problems.
8. What do you call fake spaghetti?
  An impasta.
9. Why did the coffee file a police report?
  It got mugged.
10. Why don't eggs tell jokes?
    They'd crack each other up.
11. How do you organize a space party?
    You planet.
12. Why did the tomato turn red?
    Because it saw the salad dressing.
13. What do you call a factory that makes okay products?
    A satisfactory.
14. Why don't oysters donate to charity?
    Because they're shellfish.
15. How does a penguin build its house?
    Igloos it together.
16. Why can't your nose be 12 inches long?
    Because then it would be a foot.
17. What do you call a can opener that doesn't work?
    A can't opener.
18. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
    In case he got a hole in one.
19. What do you call a bear with no teeth?
    A gummy bear.
20. Why are elevator jokes so good?
    They work on so many levels.